All Novel Romance
90
Catch At Straws Kelly's
POV
Living in a new environment wasn't easy, harder because I'm living with no one but my little angel by my side. No one's there to help me when she won't stop crying because of something I couldn't figure out. No one would carry her once my arms were numb and hurting already. No one would offer to take care of her at night whenever she wakes up and cries.
Those things were done by Pierce when I was with him but then I decided to leave and I won't regret anything
"Please take care of her while I'm at work. I will do my best to go home early."
The nanny I hired for my daughter smiled and nodded at me, She's a middle-aged woman living in the next apartment I'm renting. She offered help when we had a conversation one time and I mentioned to her that I'm searching for a nanny.
I've been living in this apartment for almost 4 months now and my savings were about to run off. I need to start working now so I would be able to save for my baby.
"Don't worry about anything Elle. I will take care of Yuki"
Obviously, I had to hide my real identity so I named myself Elle and Yuki for Snow which also means snow in Japanese.
"It's hard to raise a kid especially if you're a single mom. So you have to work really hard and save for the future of your daughter. However, you can always count on me. I'll be very willing to help and support you."
I smiled at her. "Thank you, Martha. I don't know what I'd do without you."
True to Martha's words, it wasn't easy. And because I'm hiding behind a fake name, I can only apply for jobs that don't need my legal documents.
I'm currently working as a dishwasher in a restaurant It's a very exhausting job but I have to work hard. There was even a time that I went to work while sick. I almost passed out but thinking about my baby makes me strong. Snow is the only strength I can hold on to now. As long as she's with me, I can move mountains.
"The expenses of living are rising. So I had to raise the rent fee. I'm sorry about this, Elle. If it's just me, I would spare you but you know that I have three little childrens I'm feeding."
I smiled at the owner of the apartment as I handed her my rent for the current month.
"It's okay, Perry. I understand. We're all just trying to live fairly, so don't worry. And I'm working very hard so I can pay my rent."
Truly, being a mother isn't easy. I had to give up on myself and just offer all of myself to my baby's future. Nothing is easy. Even living isn't.
"Shh! Baby, why won't you stop crying?" I asked while almost crying too.
It's already r midnight when Snow interrupted my uncomfortable sleep after working all day. I tried feeding her but she just won't stop crying.
1 felt tears rolling down my cheeks as I bit my bottom lip, stopping myself from crying too.
I don't know what to do. I'm scared. I tried checking her temperature but she's normal, so I don't know what's wrong.
Cutch At Shawd
Someone knocked on the door, followed by a hoarse voice. "Hey! Stop your child's crying. We need to
sleep too!"
My lips trembled. I don't know what to do.
"B-Baby, please, hush. Mommy is here. Please, what does my baby want?"
"Hey! Don't say such things to her! She has no control over it because her daughter is still an infant!" That was Martha's voice.
I immediately opened the door when she knocked.
""M-Martha..."
"What's wrong, Elle?"
"S-She won't stop crying. I don't know why."
"Let me carry her."
She's more experienced than me, so I carefully gave Snow to her.
"Oh! She's teething, that's why."
I blinked. "Huh? But she's just four months old."
She smiled as she carefully danced, comforting Snow.
"Some baby starts teething early."
"What should I do? She must be in pain, that's why she's crying nonstop."
"For now, use your clean finger to gently massage her swollen gums. Tomorrow, buy a teething ring. It will help her."
I quickly nodded. "Thank you, Martha."
She gave Snow back to me. "Do it so you can sleep again. You look exhausted, Elle. You should take care of yourself too."
Martha has been a great help to me. Aside from the fact that she's the nanny of my baby, I found a friend who can also give me advice about motherhood. She never abandons me. She was always there to support me especially whenever I'm losing time to take care of myself. If not for her, I would've been depressed from the very first month.
It's so hard. At first, I can just get on by thinking about my daughter but as time goes by I'm starting to question if I really picked the right decision. It was so hard to survive everyday with a small pay and limited ability. I had to settle being a dishwasher for so long. Was I too arrogant thinking I can do this just by myself? Was I too prideful? I don't know, but I'm trying to comfort myself and make myself believe in the saying 'nothing ventured, nothing gained".
And yes, it's true. All of my hardwork has paid off eventually. All of my sacrifices as a mother, all of the tears I shed and all of the sleepless night were paid off when I first heard my little angel talk. When I first saw her laugh and walk. It was beyond happiness "Mma....mmm..my..."
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was just cooing and babbling this past few months but now that she's 12 months old, she's starting to say something while looking at me and clapping her little hands, Cho was trying to
stand on her feet and I felt tears rolling down my cheeks when she did.
I clapped my hands and she pointed at me when she looked at me.
"Mmmmy...mmmy..."
I nodded as I chuckled, eyes full of tears. "Yes, baby. This is mommy. This is mommy and mommy loves you so much."
People say your baby's first word, first walk and first laugh will be a parent's reward and yes! I can say that's true. I felt so rewarded. I felt so proud.
Just like that, sweetie. Grow fast and strong. Grow beautifully. Grow smartly and with a kind heart. Soon, we'll need to go back and take back everything that originally belongs to us. I need you to be my strength because I will punish those who did us wrong. That is my reward to myself. To free myself from the pain and from the horror of the past.