She Approved the Split He Fell Apart Novel

093 I Was Her Whole World

Sebastian’s POV

Sitting in the doctor’s office, I’m waiting for Scar’s test result. I dare not go with Granny because I know Scar doesn’t want to see me. She just wants the divorce papers,

I don’t have them.

I don’t want to let her go. It’s freaking hard and I don’t know why.

I thought I could. I thought I didn’t want to divorce her just because I was used to all that she had been doing for me. I thought I was just used to having her around. I thought I had come to accept that she would be my wife.

But none of that could explain how I just wanted to dive off with her when her chair fell over the edge.

When I caught Ava’s chair, I was joyful. I was happy that I saved her. But that’s not how I felt when I jumped over for Scarlett.

When I saw Liam Ryan kick her chair, my mind went blank for a second. It was like my soul floated out of me, in fear of accepting what was happening. I flew over with only her chair in my eyes, and I couldn’t see a life beyond that day if I failed to catch her.

I only saw Adrian jumping over way after we pulled her up together, and I felt so lucky that I caught her chair, because I didn’t know Adrian had come, and I didn’t know how to forgive myself if I failed to save her when I was her only hope.

But she didn’t seem to notice me. She was shaken up like a kitten and she threw herself into Adrian the

moment she was free.

It hurts like hell.

Not just because she was in another man’s arms, but because of the pure trust she in him. Because she relied on him like a fragile little kitten, hurt once, yet still willing to trust. Just no longer trusting the one who hurt her before.

I was her husband, a word I have always felt sacred, a word I took a vow to get, and she didn’t even think I cared about her life.

She didn’t think she could rely on me.

That realization came to me like a knife to my heart, cut slow and deep, so much that I couldn’t breathe, because I dared not even imagine how desperate she was at that moment, when she thought I was there to choose Ava over her life.

I wasn’t. I really wasn’t. I care about her now, but she is no longer there to hear that. She doesn’t care about me anymore.

I don’t think she had even talked to Adrian until a week ago, and she cried in his arms, sobbing like the whole world wronged her.

I was her whole world, and I wronged her, deeply.

I thought her depending on me was a burden, but when I was relieved of that, all I could feel was a

0931 Was Her Whole World

lightness too heavy to bear.

#!

I once thought that she was wrong to be jealous of me and Ava, because I knew Ava before her, and I knew I wasn’t cheating on her. So I thought I was taking the responsibility of a husband. Like how my parents were.

Now I know. My father had love for my mother, and that made all the difference.

There isn’t enough room for a third person in love, not even a friend, if that friend sits on the line of being too intimate every now and then.

Every time when I pushed on that line, Scar would back off. And I got so used to it that I forgot the line was there. I thought the kiss was nothing, just to comfort a girl who was going to undergo a scary surgery, but I was going crazy when I watched Adrian carrying Scar downstairs to places where I couldn’t see, when it was just a hug, right after she nearly died.

If I had to watch them share a kiss, even one just on the lips like me and Ava, I would have lost it. Text property © Nôvel(D)ra/ma.Org.

I can’t imagine how deeply I hurt Scar. I dare not to think, because I know if I see clearly, then even l wouldn’t root for myself to ask her to come back.

I have been so selfish for so long, then let me be selfish this one last time. I don’t have anything else to stop her from leaving. I don’t have a reason, I don’t have a good memory shared, and I don’t have anything that could convince her to

I I don’t have her love anymore, and I didn’t know how much that empowered me until I lost it.

“Mr. Fuller?” The doctor comes in, and I stand up, “You are the husband? Your wife needs special attention, especially at such a critical period.”